It started with Richard Armitage’s interview on the Morning Show on Channel 9. I was so excited to see him; wished I woken up early to visit the studio but that didn’t lower my spirits as he came on and started talking in that sweet, sexy voice that always gave me an orgasm! Also my Twitter friends Lady Oakenshield (don’t judge her, I would’ve picked that name too) and Meri, who flew into Sydney for RA, got to meet him and take pictures. I was really happy for them. I was in the extreme state of euphoria to notice anything, well after I calmed down and saw my friends’ photos on Twitter, I was a little jealous especially that touching-the-majestic-beard pic.
I spent some hours on my essay but I was easily distracted by Richard and the live Q&A that was happening last night. I was so excited and nervous that I ended up overanalysing and found myself fantasising – here I’ll digress and keep those fantasies secret – they’re more graphic than 50 Shades or any erotic novel – too sexy and steamy that the world would burn. The world is not ready for them.
So I left the house 4 hours ahead of the event and yes, my mum came along (either to chaperone me or see Richard herself, I didn’t know anymore; I was too excited). Now I don’t want to lure people to sleep with my tale of commuting. Nothing spectacular happened other than searching for the bus stop in the city and had crossed to one side of the street and back to the other side twice. Anyway, we got to the venue and posters of Bilbo Baggins/Martin Freeman were everywhere…on one wall and my eyes caught a headshot of Richard. We were at the right place.
We went upstairs and there was already a queue of about 30 people. I was shocked. I should’ve come earlier! We waited for 2 hours for the doors to open. My feet weren’t that sore. Checking the line, it wasn’t bad. There were a lot of people behind us so that lightened my spirits and so did the girls behind talking about how sexy Richard is and his voice. I wanted to join in the conversation but didn’t want to intrude. I think we would’ve been great friends.
Oh, I almost forgot to mention the balloons with Richard’s face on them floating here and there. That was enough to give me a tight pang of orgasm. An orgasm from a balloon and an image of Richard! Yeah, my body is becoming insane. Is there therapy for this situation?
The doors finally opened and we got good seats in the second row. I couldn’t find Lady Oakenshield and Meri but I knew they would be in somewhere in the front row. By now, my cheeks and chest and pretty much everywhere was burning up. It was 30 minutes to the Q&A. I sat next to this lovely woman and we talked about Richard and if I had a question. I had three which turned into four later.
The show began and this guy – our host (I forgot his name) – went on stage and presented us a 12-minute footage of The Hobbit films that hasn’t been shown anywhere, not even on the DVD of the first movie. I’m not going to elaborate it because it was intended for the audience there. They’re (Peter and the crew, including Richard) being secretive. But I think the footage was mind-blowing!
After that, an interviewer (I forgot his name too) came up and introduced Richard!! YAY!! He walked down the aisle that was quite close to me. He was so close! Oh my god! He was so tall and mmm…he was wearing an olive jacket, jeans and beautiful, shiny shoes – I would’ve licked them. I swear the beard was thicker than the one in those newly pics of him (which came out on Monday). I itched to touch it. Richard was given a standing ovulation. He deserves it!
He looks sexy and charming as he is in his pics and interviews. He even waved back to the people on our side. It was intimate and adorable and he made eye contact with me! and I blushed even more; I hid behind my phone! The interview began with the interviewer asking Richard a few questions. I can’t remember all of them but one was about his experiences filming The Hobbit and staying in character. I think I was distracted by Richard’s voice and face and body…
After a few minutes, the interview opened up to the audience. I was one of the first people to shoot my hand up but unfortunately, they kept picking people who were sitting far away from the stage. Only a few near the front section were chosen. But the questions were good and hilarious especially one about playing roles other than brooding male ones (Richard said something about his face being mean, not fit for romantic roles – I don’t think so, Richard) and this one: who would win in a cage fight: Thorin or Dwalin? Richard just smiled and shrugged and said “well, you know, you tell me…” So he thought Thorin. I laughed so hard, I had tears! I had my hand up throughout the whole audience-asking-questions thing but wasn’t lucky. They had to wrap up. I was disappointed, still am but at least I got to see Richard up close and listen to him. The interviewer’s last question was what if Richard had met Tolkien: what would he have asked him and Richard answered that he would’ve asked if Thorin had a special someone. Everyone including me was swooning and awwwing (yes that’s a word). It was a perfect question to end the Q&A. I bet people are writing fanfics about Thorin being betrothed to a dwarf princess right now – the Tolkien fandom on Tumblr must be exploding. Richard was so thoughtful about Thorin having a fiancée or a beloved before Smaug (the dragon) destroyed everything – I tried to stop myself from turning my eyes into water!
The Q&A ended and Richard had to leave. He left the stage with a standing ovulation. He applauded as well. So adorable and precious. He went back up the same aisle, again so close to me! We all watched him go and about to go through the wrong exit – he’s still in character hahaha! He finally went through the right one and was gone. I wished he stayed for the movie (The Hobbit) and did signings after – that was what I was thinking about whilst watching the movie (I was still paying attention to the movie by the way). My respect and love for Richard has increased and my cheeks are still burning as I write a full stop to this tale.